作文觀摩 - A Student's Composition

Saying "Thank you” and "I am sorry".

I think that saying "Thank you" and "I'm sorry" is a basic thing. Just elementary like saying "I want to go to a toilet." If you feel thankful then you can say "Thank you" or "Thanks." On the same way , in case of apologize to someone , you can say "I'm sorry" or "Pardon me."
Although it is very easy , it plays am important role in our daily life. In the event of not say those , people may feel you are impolite , because of that it is an emblem of polite. Perhaps you met a person who you don't kown , the word "sorry" or "thanks" may leave a good impression. Moreover , saying "Thank you" with a little smile can add a sense of kind.
In sum , "Thank you" and "I'm sorry" can make your life better. Try it!
(以上為學生之原作品)

(以下為美國老師修改後之作文；紅色部分為訂正處。)

Saying “Thank you” and "I am sorry".

I think that saying "Thank you" and "I'm sorry" is a basic thing. It's elementary like saying "I want to go to a toilet." If you feel thankful then you can say "Thank you" or "Thanks." In the same way, when apologizing to someone, you can say "I'm sorry" or "Pardon me."
Although it is very easy, it plays an important role in our daily life. In the event of not say those things, people may feel you are impolite, because of that it is an emblem of politeness. Perhaps when you meet a person who you don't know, the word "sorry" or "thanks" may leave a good impression. Moreover, saying "Thank you" with a little smile can add a sense of kindness.
In sum, saying "Thank you" and "I'm sorry" can make your life better. Try it!

Comments: (美國老師之評語)
I thought your composition was very well written. Make sure that when you type you do not put a space in between a word and the punctuation mark that follows. Also remember that the words “polite” and “kind” are adjectives, and that to derive the noun form you would add the suffix of “ness”. Good job!

附註：本篇文章文意流暢，內容切題，論點清晰，結論言簡意賅值得加分。

作文觀摩 - A Student's Composition

Saying “Thank you” and “I’m sorry”
Saying “Thank you” and “I’m sorry” frequently will make you a happier person.
It is true that you say sorry and thank you as much as you can make your life much happier. If you said sorry when you are wrong to others it might decrease arguments. On the other hand if you say thank you frequently you will feel that everything is fine. For example when I was young I had a little of friends it because that I seldom said those word. But when I grew up I found that those word could make my life much happier and make a lot of friend. So I will say that during my life to make my life more colorful.
(以上為學生之原作品)


(以下為美國老師修改後之文章－黃色部分為訂正處)

Saying “Thank you” and “I’m sorry”
Saying “thank you” and “I’m sorry” frequently will make you a happier person.
It is true that you should say sorry and thank you as much as you can to make your life much happier. If you say sorry when you are wrong to others it might decrease arguments. On the other hand, if you say thank you frequently you will feel that everything is fine. For example, when I was young I had few friends because I seldom said those words. But when I grew up I found that those words could make my life much happier and help me to make a lot of friends. So I will say these words during my life to make my life more colorful.

Comments: (美國老師之講評)
Thank you for passing along a lovely message. There are just a couple of things that can be changed to improve the English in your composition. Remember that the word “those” and “these” modify nouns in the plural form, as in “those words” or “these ideas.” Also, remember to use punctuation marks such as commas to add pauses in your sentences and avoid run-on sentences.

附註: 此篇文章原作者是本班一位高中生。原文長126個字，文意表達清楚而且切題，應可得到不錯的分數。唯需注意美國老師修正之處，特別是「標點符號」和「單、複數」以及「動詞時態」的正確用法。

My Wish for You in 2007

Happy New Year!

I received this e-mail on January 3, and I love it. I think you will love it, too.

My Wish for You in 2007

May peace break into your house and may thieves come to steal your debts. May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet of $200 bills. May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may laughter assault your lips! May your clothes smell of success like smoking tires and may happiness slap you across the face and may your tears be that of joy. May the problems you had forget your home address! In simple words……

May 2007 be the best year of your life!!

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

(中文試譯)

願和平闖入你家，願小偷們來偷走你的債務。願你的牛仔衣的口袋成為吸引大鈔的磁石。願愛像凡士林一樣黏在你的臉上，願笑聲擊打你的雙唇！願你衣服上成功的味道就像冒煙的輪胎，願幸福掌摑你的臉，並願你流歡樂的淚。願你以前有的問題忘了你家的地址！簡言之－－－

願2007年是你生命中最棒的一年！！

簡單過活。慷慨施愛。深層關心。言語慈悲。其餘的留給上帝。

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!
Look at these happy faces! Do you know whose birthday it is?
這是兒童英語聖經班的老師Sunny和部分同學，他們一同慶祝老師的生日。